Staying Hyped With Mikey: Any Man With Two Hands Can Review Smackdown Live!!

  Mikey is back once again with his unique perspective on this week's Smackdown Live. How did he enjoy (or facepalm dislike) the post-TLC Fallout?  Read on!!



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Dean Ambrose wastes no time hitting Dirty Deeds on James Ellsworth. Doesn’t say a word.
Crazy that he hit that final table spot from all the way on top of the ladder, but AJ’s the one in the boot.

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The Wyatts with Randy Orton have a chance to be a dominant tag team for awhile. But my guess is Randy will turn long before they get on a long run.
Still nice to see Bray with a title. I can’t remember him ever getting one before. His booking could be fixed now and there’d still be time for him to have a great career.

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I do not think Rhyno and Heath Slater will be getting their Tag Team Titles back at this time. #SoothsayerYo

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See? I know EVERYTHING. 

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“Speed kills.” -Kalisto
….Usually it's the stop after the speed that kills. #SeeActuallies #BeingTHATGuy

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Carmella has really long hair. #ShitYouNoticeEventually

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Carmella has a shiner. #ShitMyWifeNotices

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“Shuddup I’m tawwlking!!!”
Boom.

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Little less on the running. Little more on the pillow fighting ladies. #MakinEverythingBetter

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Nikki “Anti-Climactic Showdowns” Bella.

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“There’s no denying that he’s fast…..That’s what SHE SAID!!!!” #BaronCorbinNewLines

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Here’s Ascension out here with cool make-up.
They gonna win?
No.

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Ok. You’re giving The Ascension a video promo.
Can they please be credible now?

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Ascension at least getting to mock The Hype Bros.
Every little bit of momentum helps.

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*sigh*
The Ascension are the San Diego Sports of WWE. #GoddammitVince

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Still makes no sense whatsoever to go from the longest reigning Tag Team Champions in NXT to utter shit on the main roster.
It’s these cases where you understand fully why Cody Rhodes left.

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Gotta hand it to the Miz for essentially being a flop as World Champion, but staying relevant, staying one of the best heels, and staying worthy of the mid-card title scene.

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My wife notes how Miz always throws his wife in front of him as a shield. He just did it again to run away from Ambrose.

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“Miz Participation Award: You Tried”
The crowd chants “you deserve it”.
It’s weird. I don’t know when the crowds turned on Dean, but they definitely did.
Last summer when he almost won the title against Seth Rollins, the crowds loved him. I still love ‘im.
So what happened?

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No sooner do I say to my wife that Dean vs. Miz isn’t for the title then Daniel Bryan makes it for the title. #Dick #MadeMeWrongAndShit

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Corbin beats Kalisto again.
Why’s this feud still going on?

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Yeah Nikki’s boobs definitely look bigger. #CertifiedExpert #FanOfBoobs

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Breezango’s Fashion Police thing, somehow, just works.

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I giggled too hard at the microphone cord/camera cord confusion just now. #EasilyAmused

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Breezango loses to American Alpha of course.
Call it “Smackdown: The Jobber Tag Team Division”. #NotFantasticJBL

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Polarizing figure, that Alexa Bliss.
Yeah I’ve got a fanboy crush on her I think. Still the best woman on the mic. #Swoon

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Ok Alexa’s music could be better, that I’ll admit. Reminds me of Carrie Underwood’s “Church Bells”. #Meh #Bleh

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On one hand, there’s no credible babyface challenger to Miz right now, really, and Dean may be getting moved out of the WWE title picture. That would then make sense then for Dean to win this. (Plus AJ may be getting ready for The Deadman or Cena.)
On the other hand this match feels like a one-off just because.
I’m guessing Miz retains the IC title, because Ellsworth fucks it up for Dean again.

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Speaking of credible babyface challengers, they dropped any push for Apollo Crews real quick, huh?

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Announcers are saying phrases like “Twitter troglodytes” and “bequeath”.
Da fuq is this, "Frasier"?

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Dean hits To Beah Suucuda (spelling).
Where’s Ellsworth? Gotta fuck it up for Dean somehow.

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“I think his [Miz’s] money maker is on the outside of the ring.”
Heh. Zing.

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Meryse tried to screw it up for Dean.
ANNNND there’s Ellsworth. #OfCourse

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Ellsworth stalled the three count long enough for Dean to lose.
Yep.

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I can’t bitch at WWE for being predictable when I eat it all up either way.
I like “putzing people” Dean better than “getting putzed” Dean.