Never To Be Deleted or Obsolete: Mikey's Stream of Impact Wrestling Thoughts

 You didn't think only World Wrestling Entertainment received attention from Mikey did you?

Silly readers!  Impact Wrestling is firmly on his radar. Even if you are a lapsed viewer you don't want to miss out on his free flowing thoughts about last night's show!  Stay hyped and read on!!





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I defy any of you to listen to Moose's theme song and not start doing the arm gesture.

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Awesome. Drew Galloway is back.

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"Should we burn this bitch to the ground?"
-Drew Galloway

Baller.

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Love me some Sandow/Aaron Rex.

But the hot pink wrestling shorts have gotta go.

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"If you don't shut up I'm gonna sue you all for Rexual Harassment!"

Oh dear.

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Aaron Rex invokes his re-match clause for an immediate match with Moose.

The crowd was into Galloway vs. Moose.

They're not into this.


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Way too soon to pronounce Aaron Rex's Impact Wrestling run to be a failure. (Notwithstanding that the whole company has been on life support for months.)

But, the audience dug him before. They don't now.

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Moose retains. Him and Galloway are set for a match at some point.

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Drew Galloway mirroring Seth Rollins' narrative from WWE before he got hurt.

"I put this company on my back, and got hurt because of it." (paraphrasing)

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Aiden O'Shea wrestles in a button up shirt and formal pants.

That's....new.

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Mandrews. Funny name.

They've gotta do some kind of Mandrews Mainsplains gimmick.

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Now Aiden O'Shea loses the button up shirt in favor of a wifebeater. #DressAppropriatelyForWork


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Mandrews manwins. #ShowMyselfOut


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A Double Strap match.

Don't say it involves strap-ons.

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Did I hear this right? One of these guys is named Baraka? #MortalKombat

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Al Snow and Sheira (sp?) win the first ever Double Strap (not a strap-on) Match.

I know, gotta differentiate the Impact brand somehow. #CrazyGimmicks

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Broken Matt Hardy wakes up in a start and repeats "Apocalypto!".

One gets the sense that this is a nightly occurrence.

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There's Eli Drake. He still can't talk

Kinda funny to watch his facial reactions.

But I need my Eli back.

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"An event so massive that Dixie Carter could not promote it."

...Uh, bad example, Matt.

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Total Nonstop Deletion sounds like a fun concept (filming entirely on the Hardy Compound).

Impact Wrestling has been going all out with their out-of-ring battles. So much so that WWE even blatantly ripped off The Final Deletion and substituted New Day vs The Wyatts.

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I'm always going to associate this Marilyn Manson song with Decay now. #Awesome

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Is Allie actually going to get in the ring, or is this just a fakeout?

....I call fakeout.

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Nevermind. No fakeout. #InRingAllie

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Laurel goes for a curb stomp on Allie.

Notice Vince McMahon isn't around to ban the move. #Grrr #NotOverIt

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Allie wins with a DDT.

And hits Maria before she has a chance to retaliate.

'Bout time. #FightinAllie

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Allie gives Braxton whatshisname a nervous peck on the lips.

Her character is adorable.

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EC3 vs. Eddie Edwards in the Main Event.

I think the belt changes hands. What the hell, I'll call that my prediction. Eddie Edwards wins. #RiskBigWinBig


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It's tougher to judge when the belts will change hands in Impact Wrestling since they hardly do any pay-per-views.

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Eddie Edwards hits a top rope Hurricane Conrada (sp) on EC3.

Impressive move. With crazy between-the-legs flips like that, I always wonder how these guys or gals don't get hurt.

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Eddie Edwards follows it up with an inside to outside the ring spear.

Another one that has potential for disaster, but they make it look easy.

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EC3 counters with two Powerbombs.


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EC3 goes for the suplex, Eddie lands on his feet. Then Eddie counters with a Powerbomb and failed cover.

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EC3 did the Superplex to Eddie Edwards, but Eddie went for the cover afterward. Move mix-up?

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Eddie Edwards hits Boston Knee Party. EC3 retreats out of the ring.

Eddie goes for the leaping hit, EC3 counters with a TK3.

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EC3 rolls Eddie back into the ring.

Eddie counters and gets EC3 into a Boston Crab hold.

EC3 makes it to the rope.


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A few kick trades later, and Eddie Edwards hits a chin checker.

EC3 follows by hooking Eddie.

Bell rings.

No one knows who won yet.

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Three count and tap-out happened simultaneously. Therefore, no-contest and Eddie retains.

Ok. #MakeBothGuysNotLookBad


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I get having neither guy lose, but having the match end on weird controversies is never a crowd pleaser.

Next week with Total Nonstop Deletion should be fun though.